sex-uality

i must have passed through a warp zone

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new-jersey-governor

After seeing this on the front page of foxnews.com

It makes me wonder, what year are we in?!?! Is this normal?!?!

This just proves my theory that gay-ex-governors of New Jersey always have threesomes with their wives and drivers.

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question of the day: sonny corleone style

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Can you have casual sex while wearing a tuxedo?

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what’s wrong with people??

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When I was 20 years old, I was pretty nervous to have oral sex with a girl my age, in my home, with the doors locked, and my parents in another country…let alone on a school bus full of middle schoolers.

Apparently Brandon Bass from Vidalia, LA, felt it was an appropriate place to do so, with a 13 year old, however.

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barf

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Dear Women,

Who do you think you are fooling?  Do you really think we are that dumb?  Just because you bleach the hair, it doesn’t mean you don’t  have a moustache growing on your upper lip.

Bleach_vs_laser

Why don’t you save yourself the embarrassment and just get it waxed off, better yet just go ahead and get it lasered.  I see no time in the future where having that hair-bleached or not, will be necessary.

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reader submissions

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www.urbandictionary.com definition of skeet, thanks mark morris!

1. skeet

"Skeet" is actually a form of birth control practiced by the African-American tribes of North America near the beginning of the 21st Centruy. Visionaries of the time (such as Lil Jon and Nelly) recognized the inevitable and everpresent danger of overpopulation in their land and decided to take action. They discovered an ancient form of birth control used by their ancestors that involved "pulling out and shooting" (much like skeet shooting) during sexual intercourse, as to not impregnate the female, or "biatch". The visionaries spread the word the only way they knew how: rap music. People would listen to the songs of the visionaries during ritual smoking ceremonies and chant "skeet skeet skeet!". Every tribe of their kind in the land listened to rap music and the idea of skeeting quickly gained in popularity. Soon, the entire African-American tribe had done its part to offset the effects of overpopulation through generations of skeeting on the women that they did not wish to impregnate. However, the other tribes of the land (most notabley, the Whites and Mexicans) did not support the "Skeet Movement". They continued to grow in number until the Whites eventually ate the Mexicans. The Whites, however, refused to eat the African-Americans for fear of sickle cell anemia, so they all got on a very large boat and went back to England.

"Excuse me, I didn’t catch your name, but would you mind if I skeeted on you? Seeing as how we just met and all, I am not fully convinced that you would make a good mother, so I am electing not to ejaculate inside of you. Let me go get you a towel."

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