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next time you are bored…
Feb 27th
For this task, you will need: a joint, a bottle of whiskey, a loaded handgun and a car.
Next time you are driving, go really fast.
When you hit about 100, take out a doob and start puffing.
When you finish it, at this time you should be going about 150.
Here, take a shot of the whiskey for every mile you drive.
Then start shooting the handgun I said you should have in part one. Shoot for every half mile you drive at any moving object in sight. Shoot until a cop pulls you over.
When he pulls you over, say sorry, and confess you where on a stakeout and you where really an undercover law abiding citizen.
If they are allowed to be undercover cops, we are allowed to be undercover law abiding citizens.
you must not know bout me
Jan 10th
You may have seen this before, there is a crime, and they offer a reward leading to the arrest of the criminal. They even say you can remain anonymous.
Which is why I am proud to announce that tomorrow I am going to become a detective, and right before I am about to solve a crime I am going to call the police and give them the information on that crime. Of course, they will call me back with that same information (as if I didn’t know already,…"Oh, where is the killer? Wow, I would never have guessed!" and I will make the arrest.
So in the end, I will do my job in catching the criminal, and earn an anonymous tax-free commission while doing it. What a country!
doesn’t it make you feel good?
Jan 8th
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