about 2 years ago - 2 comments
The Mafia:
They kill people.
They shoot them, they strangle them with a thin wire, they cut whole bodies up with pocket knifes, they smash bones with sledgehammers, they cut people up with tablesaws, they bury your legs in concrete and throw you in the ocean alive, they will throw a molotov cocktail in your house while More >
about 2 years ago - No comments
It’s pretty simple.
If poor people would just stop getting sick, then they wouldn’t have to worry about coverage.
Duh!
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about 2 years ago - No comments
Dear Roommates,
This your final warning. Next time you decide that you are too lazy to put the new roll of TP onto the roller, I just might happen to be lazy myself and decide that the bathroom is too far and proceed to do my #2 on your Macbook Pro.
xoxoxoxo,
JZ
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about 2 years ago - No comments
Keeping on the topic of the bathroom. I am tired of hearing women bitching complaining about “leaving the toilet seat down”. And more importantly hearing men complain that they don’t want to do it.
Know what I do? I put the seat and the cover down after I go.
That way no one has the advantage.
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about 2 years ago - No comments
I bet you didn’t know this about me. But I go to the bathroom (#1) faster than anyone I know. Nine times out of ten the first thing I hear when I exit a bathroom is ”did you even go?” It’s quite embarrasing. How do I deal with it you ask? I just hang out in the bathroom More >
about 3 years ago - No comments
Who says we are in a REcession?
People are buying Illinois shaped corn flakes for $1,350 on Ebay.
This whole recession thing just looks like a classic case of the wrong “RE”.
America isn’t in a REcession
America is REtarded.
Amazon.com sells a pack of 7-24oz boxes of Corn flakes for $32.64 (with free shipping). This means with $1,350 they More >
about 3 years ago - No comments
There is just no more privacy in America
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about 4 years ago - No comments
I don’t know if THIS is a joke, but apparently some Eithiopians have been caught trying to sneak into America as stow aways on a plane in the overhead compartment.
This brings two things to mind
Either A. we need to send them more food
or B. Airlines can start selling the overhead compartments on flights at a More >
about 4 years ago - No comments
You know whats the best invention?
Facebook gifts.
Example: As you can see above this weekend they had a VERY LIMITED EDITION of TEN MILLION champaign bottles available to give out, at a dollar a piece! If they sell 10% of these at a minimum that’s a million dollars, all for drawing a picture and a little More >
about 4 years ago - No comments
I think if Humpty Dumpty were to fall today, all of the kings horses and all of the kings men would just google search how to put him back together thus rendering the whole story obsolete. It wouldn’t have even received one digg.
Which, in all honesty, this is the first time I ever thought about More >
